Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
