Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
