super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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