she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
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