I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
