so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
