check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
