Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
