My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
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