there were more penises there than on chat roulette
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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