he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
