I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
