Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
