Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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