Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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