Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize