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Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
