So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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