Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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