Tell her she can't have a vagina
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
