She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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