Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
