so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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