So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
