Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
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