If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
