He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
