weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
