you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
