shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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