If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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