And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize