what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
