ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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