god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
