I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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