Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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