Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
