You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
