in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
now i know why i became what i already was.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
