It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
