Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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