I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
