Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
