I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Randomize
