Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
too bad you live with your parents still
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
