Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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