sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
We have started to decorate penises.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
