i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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