you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
