Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize