Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
